Well, hello there. Everyone working hard? Or hardly working?
Challenge: design an outfit for a hip international jetsetter which turned out to be themselves. Yes, the designers had to design something for themselves and the models they picked (everyone kept the same model – surprise – Amanda, Kayne’s model has an epileptic fit when she got backstage coz he kept her around) will be used for next week’s showdown. Time limit: one day.
Show starts with a Kayne shirtless upper body shot – gay men everywhere rejoice! Which only sets the tone for this show because later we get to see some unflattering body shots of the designers as they get into their designs.
Laura tells us that she “never lets children hold her back.” Methinks she barely registers the fact she has produced 5, going on 6, offspring and does whatever the hell she wants, regardless of who’s hanging off her tit.
Jeff bitches and moans about having Angela’s mother for the last challenge and Angela in general. Angela takes it personal and tries to confront Jeff in the the same manner her mother did, sort of passive.
Ideas: Michael decides to do “Hamptons meets the Hood”. Kayne decides to go tacky with a big-ass pattern. Uli decides to do a party dress with multiple prints. Jeff immediately thinks “rock star”. Vincent goes with the “pack and go” concept. Laura decides on a simple cocktail dress. And Angela, the backwoods farm girl, has no idea what a jetsetter wears or how to go about it, so she decides to use a cousin as an example. Cousin, heh, I have a lot of inappropriate redneck/backwoods jokes coming to the fore, but I. must. resist.
Tim visits the jetsetters. He makes some suggestions to Michael and then zeros in on Kayne, who is going all Elvis (I ask you what else is a southern gay man with acknowledged white trash roots supposed to do?), and Angela, who is going off in a Holly Hobby Junior fashion direction with two big rosettes on each butt cheek (I ask you, wouldn’t a farm girl think Holly Hobby is a jetsetter? God knows she wouldn’t have a Barbie).
That night, Michael gives Kayne runway walking tips.
Michael: Walk like you mean it.
Kayne: Yeah, but you’re, like, ghetto fabulous and I’m just white trash.
Runway Day
Shots of the designers dressing in their outfits. Laura is apparently not a shrinking violet as she just strips and dresses at her table. Angela, tho, runs to change behind the screen. I really didn’t need to see Vincent getting into his clothes. Now I have visuals of a half-dressed mental patient running thru my head. Then we see shots of them getting haired and make-upped except for Michael, who was zippily finishing his shirt creation.
Vincent shuffles down the runway in plain black pants and V-necked long sleeved shirt.
Jeff struts down flaunting leggings as pants with rhinestone crotch accessory, rhinestoned black T, and purple blazer.
Angela plows her way down the runway wearing brown linen guachos (sp?) and a rosy wrinkly tank balloon top and a huge-ass bag of voluminous capacity.
Laura saunters down wearing the Emperor’s New Clothes. I can barely see the dress as it matches her skin exactly. All I see is some faint criss-crossing detail and her Veronica Lake auburn hairdo.
Michael gangsta-limps/pimp-strolls down wearing blue and white striped seersucker cargo pants with tentacles and a crispy white shirt.
Kayne trudges down the runway wearing extremely tight bootylicious black pants, a black shirt with Elvis fantasy detailing on the back and one cuff, and sporting a rhinestone belt buckle of his name.
Uli floats down wearing a long, flowing, loose-boobie, turquoise and multi-print dress. Have we seen this silhouette before? I think we have.
Judges determine that while Vincent played it extremely safe, it is an outfit that can be traveled in. Jeff’s outfit looks expensive and will work anywhere. Angela is told linen is the WRONG fabric of choice for traveling as it keeps on wrinklin’ and she already looks like a mess on the runway. Laura’s dress can go many places and fit in. Michael was applauded for picking seersucker as that fabric can travel. Kayne’s Elvis aspirations were thrown back at him and not in a positive way. And Uli was told she finally went over the top and her dress would only work in certain places.
Heidi tells them they are going to test their outfits’ traveling factor and they have an hour to pack and get to the airport. Shots of designers scurrying around packing and then at the airport learning they are to go to Paris, the fashion Mecca of the world. Laura is made giddy by the fact they will be traveling first class and moves the knot to the front so she can lounge in the seat. While everyone is sipping champagne, Tim comes aboard and Jeff confessed he would be lost without Tim “popping up in his life”.
Designers get to Paris Parsons to find only 6 tables, meaning someone who just had their ass hauled to Paris will have to turn right around and go back home. A famous designer with an unpronounceable name judges how the outfits fared and her scores were added to the scores given back in the USA.
Winner: Jeff, who attributed his win to God being off the sauce for this competiton.
Out: Angela, who’s “future is one big rosette of possibility” (my words). Jeff was ecstatic. He said the “artsy craftsy macaroni gluer is finally going home”.
Challenge: design an outfit for a hip international jetsetter which turned out to be themselves. Yes, the designers had to design something for themselves and the models they picked (everyone kept the same model – surprise – Amanda, Kayne’s model has an epileptic fit when she got backstage coz he kept her around) will be used for next week’s showdown. Time limit: one day.
Show starts with a Kayne shirtless upper body shot – gay men everywhere rejoice! Which only sets the tone for this show because later we get to see some unflattering body shots of the designers as they get into their designs.
Laura tells us that she “never lets children hold her back.” Methinks she barely registers the fact she has produced 5, going on 6, offspring and does whatever the hell she wants, regardless of who’s hanging off her tit.
Jeff bitches and moans about having Angela’s mother for the last challenge and Angela in general. Angela takes it personal and tries to confront Jeff in the the same manner her mother did, sort of passive.
Ideas: Michael decides to do “Hamptons meets the Hood”. Kayne decides to go tacky with a big-ass pattern. Uli decides to do a party dress with multiple prints. Jeff immediately thinks “rock star”. Vincent goes with the “pack and go” concept. Laura decides on a simple cocktail dress. And Angela, the backwoods farm girl, has no idea what a jetsetter wears or how to go about it, so she decides to use a cousin as an example. Cousin, heh, I have a lot of inappropriate redneck/backwoods jokes coming to the fore, but I. must. resist.
Tim visits the jetsetters. He makes some suggestions to Michael and then zeros in on Kayne, who is going all Elvis (I ask you what else is a southern gay man with acknowledged white trash roots supposed to do?), and Angela, who is going off in a Holly Hobby Junior fashion direction with two big rosettes on each butt cheek (I ask you, wouldn’t a farm girl think Holly Hobby is a jetsetter? God knows she wouldn’t have a Barbie).
That night, Michael gives Kayne runway walking tips.
Michael: Walk like you mean it.
Kayne: Yeah, but you’re, like, ghetto fabulous and I’m just white trash.
Runway Day
Shots of the designers dressing in their outfits. Laura is apparently not a shrinking violet as she just strips and dresses at her table. Angela, tho, runs to change behind the screen. I really didn’t need to see Vincent getting into his clothes. Now I have visuals of a half-dressed mental patient running thru my head. Then we see shots of them getting haired and make-upped except for Michael, who was zippily finishing his shirt creation.
Vincent shuffles down the runway in plain black pants and V-necked long sleeved shirt.
Jeff struts down flaunting leggings as pants with rhinestone crotch accessory, rhinestoned black T, and purple blazer.
Angela plows her way down the runway wearing brown linen guachos (sp?) and a rosy wrinkly tank balloon top and a huge-ass bag of voluminous capacity.
Laura saunters down wearing the Emperor’s New Clothes. I can barely see the dress as it matches her skin exactly. All I see is some faint criss-crossing detail and her Veronica Lake auburn hairdo.
Michael gangsta-limps/pimp-strolls down wearing blue and white striped seersucker cargo pants with tentacles and a crispy white shirt.
Kayne trudges down the runway wearing extremely tight bootylicious black pants, a black shirt with Elvis fantasy detailing on the back and one cuff, and sporting a rhinestone belt buckle of his name.
Uli floats down wearing a long, flowing, loose-boobie, turquoise and multi-print dress. Have we seen this silhouette before? I think we have.
Judges determine that while Vincent played it extremely safe, it is an outfit that can be traveled in. Jeff’s outfit looks expensive and will work anywhere. Angela is told linen is the WRONG fabric of choice for traveling as it keeps on wrinklin’ and she already looks like a mess on the runway. Laura’s dress can go many places and fit in. Michael was applauded for picking seersucker as that fabric can travel. Kayne’s Elvis aspirations were thrown back at him and not in a positive way. And Uli was told she finally went over the top and her dress would only work in certain places.
Heidi tells them they are going to test their outfits’ traveling factor and they have an hour to pack and get to the airport. Shots of designers scurrying around packing and then at the airport learning they are to go to Paris, the fashion Mecca of the world. Laura is made giddy by the fact they will be traveling first class and moves the knot to the front so she can lounge in the seat. While everyone is sipping champagne, Tim comes aboard and Jeff confessed he would be lost without Tim “popping up in his life”.
Designers get to Paris Parsons to find only 6 tables, meaning someone who just had their ass hauled to Paris will have to turn right around and go back home. A famous designer with an unpronounceable name judges how the outfits fared and her scores were added to the scores given back in the USA.
Winner: Jeff, who attributed his win to God being off the sauce for this competiton.
Out: Angela, who’s “future is one big rosette of possibility” (my words). Jeff was ecstatic. He said the “artsy craftsy macaroni gluer is finally going home”.
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