Boy, am I draggin’ butt this morning. I don’t feel particularly witty or interesting and I have to admit, I had a hard time paying attention to last night’s runway. You know, if someone’s bugging me or I don’t cotton to someone, I IGNORE them. I treat them like they don’t exist, they aren’t there, or I put headphones on to be proactive and not hear them so I don’t rip them a new asshole. Why can’t Jeff and Angela just ignore each other? Acting like the preschoolers I worked with is so not attractive and gets tiring real fast. Real fast.
Challenge: Designers had to design an outfit for the everyday woman (read: a woman that is not a size 0 or 2 or a wire/wooden hanger) who turned out to be their mothers and sisters. Tim’s two cents: “keep their day to day lifestyle in mind, be fashion forward, and designs should reflect the designer.” One day to complete this outfit.
Twist: They could not have their relative; another designer had to pick them. Forgive me as I refer to all the relatives by their relation to whom as I did not make an effort to remember their names. As usual, Heidi drew the designers’ order from the velvet bag.
Michael picked Robert’s sister.
Laura picked Jeff’s mom to “torture him” as she put it.
Vincent picked Uli’s mom. This was amusing – a woman who barely speaks English and a man who listens to voices in his head matched together.
Angela picked Laura’s mom, maybe to thank her for sticking up for her. What Angela doesn’t perhaps realize is that Laura doesn’t actually like her, she just despises Jeff more.
Kayne picked Michael’s mom. He said he could relate as he used to be 300lbs.
Uli picked Kayne’s mom.
Robert picked Vincent’s sister.
And Jeff was left with Angela’s mom. He stated he thought “God got drunk today”; I think it was more of a Kharmic bitchslap.
Everyone had bonding and embarrassment time with their moms and sisters on the tab of Michael Kors and his carbon copy of a mother. Kayne’s mom shared his “fat and funny pictures”. We got to see Michael as a skinny pre-adolescent and Jeff with an 80’s English mod haircut with blond ends (very DuranDuran). We also learned Jeff is a recovering alcoholic. Maybe that’s why he’s so antagonistic towards Angela; she drives him to want to drink. Laura drops the “baby #6 bomb” on her mother who was flabbergasted. Seriously, the picture of her look would be next to that word in the dictionary. Now everyone knows but Laura’s husband.
Many shots of collaborating or lack thereof (re: Jeff and Angela’s mom – As he put it, “I don’t like her daughter, why would I like the mother?”), frantic working on the outfits, puzzling over the fit (re: Jeff and Robert are all bestirred and bothered), and Jeff reducing Angela’s mom to tears, which makes Angela cry, which makes Jeff’s mom cry. The only one in the situation NOT crying is Jeff. He seems to have taken up Keith’s arrogant mantle and scepter.
Runway Day which Robert refers to as a “mindfuck”.
The judges liked: Uli’s because the print was interesting but not vulgar, understated, chic, and it hung and draped well. (I didn’t like it because I don’t like paisley chiffony poncho-type tops with striped edging as a rule.) Michael’s because a reversible shirt dress is a great idea and the shirtdress had a modern look. (I liked the reversibleness but didn’t like the tie belt.) Vincent’s (surprise surprise) because it was chic, spirited (coz spirits communicate with him?), and age appropriate. (I didn’t think the construction was all that great, the seams were bunchy in the back and I thought the lapels were HUGE and baby-poop colored.)
The judges didn’t like: everyone else! Angela’s was age-inappropriate. Kayne’s didn’t have enough personality. Robert’s was boring boring boring again. Laura’s was a high waisted cruise ship nightmare. Jeff designed something a court Judge would wear (and Heidi elicited Angela’s mom’s true opinion on the outfit – “she would pass it by in a store”).
Winner: Are you all ready for this? Vincent!
Out: Robert because of his consistent ho-humminess. Robert told us he learned about what he can and can’t do. I hope he learned to stick with Barbies as he seems more innovative and creative with a plastic 12 inch doll with a tiny waist and big boobs.
Jeff told his mother that the wrong person left as Robert is a “good person”. And he cried.
Challenge: Designers had to design an outfit for the everyday woman (read: a woman that is not a size 0 or 2 or a wire/wooden hanger) who turned out to be their mothers and sisters. Tim’s two cents: “keep their day to day lifestyle in mind, be fashion forward, and designs should reflect the designer.” One day to complete this outfit.
Twist: They could not have their relative; another designer had to pick them. Forgive me as I refer to all the relatives by their relation to whom as I did not make an effort to remember their names. As usual, Heidi drew the designers’ order from the velvet bag.
Michael picked Robert’s sister.
Laura picked Jeff’s mom to “torture him” as she put it.
Vincent picked Uli’s mom. This was amusing – a woman who barely speaks English and a man who listens to voices in his head matched together.
Angela picked Laura’s mom, maybe to thank her for sticking up for her. What Angela doesn’t perhaps realize is that Laura doesn’t actually like her, she just despises Jeff more.
Kayne picked Michael’s mom. He said he could relate as he used to be 300lbs.
Uli picked Kayne’s mom.
Robert picked Vincent’s sister.
And Jeff was left with Angela’s mom. He stated he thought “God got drunk today”; I think it was more of a Kharmic bitchslap.
Everyone had bonding and embarrassment time with their moms and sisters on the tab of Michael Kors and his carbon copy of a mother. Kayne’s mom shared his “fat and funny pictures”. We got to see Michael as a skinny pre-adolescent and Jeff with an 80’s English mod haircut with blond ends (very DuranDuran). We also learned Jeff is a recovering alcoholic. Maybe that’s why he’s so antagonistic towards Angela; she drives him to want to drink. Laura drops the “baby #6 bomb” on her mother who was flabbergasted. Seriously, the picture of her look would be next to that word in the dictionary. Now everyone knows but Laura’s husband.
Many shots of collaborating or lack thereof (re: Jeff and Angela’s mom – As he put it, “I don’t like her daughter, why would I like the mother?”), frantic working on the outfits, puzzling over the fit (re: Jeff and Robert are all bestirred and bothered), and Jeff reducing Angela’s mom to tears, which makes Angela cry, which makes Jeff’s mom cry. The only one in the situation NOT crying is Jeff. He seems to have taken up Keith’s arrogant mantle and scepter.
Runway Day which Robert refers to as a “mindfuck”.
The judges liked: Uli’s because the print was interesting but not vulgar, understated, chic, and it hung and draped well. (I didn’t like it because I don’t like paisley chiffony poncho-type tops with striped edging as a rule.) Michael’s because a reversible shirt dress is a great idea and the shirtdress had a modern look. (I liked the reversibleness but didn’t like the tie belt.) Vincent’s (surprise surprise) because it was chic, spirited (coz spirits communicate with him?), and age appropriate. (I didn’t think the construction was all that great, the seams were bunchy in the back and I thought the lapels were HUGE and baby-poop colored.)
The judges didn’t like: everyone else! Angela’s was age-inappropriate. Kayne’s didn’t have enough personality. Robert’s was boring boring boring again. Laura’s was a high waisted cruise ship nightmare. Jeff designed something a court Judge would wear (and Heidi elicited Angela’s mom’s true opinion on the outfit – “she would pass it by in a store”).
Winner: Are you all ready for this? Vincent!
Out: Robert because of his consistent ho-humminess. Robert told us he learned about what he can and can’t do. I hope he learned to stick with Barbies as he seems more innovative and creative with a plastic 12 inch doll with a tiny waist and big boobs.
Jeff told his mother that the wrong person left as Robert is a “good person”. And he cried.
2 comments:
Laura is preggers? I missed most of last night's episode-- just saw the end where the judges--judged.
I will immediately go to the TiVo and watch. It's almost like watching WWF (World Wrestling Federation) all drama, whining, some small amount of pretend fighting and models. Hooters type models but still walking around looking pretty.
Maybe they should have had a Hooters design project.
As a plus person-- I wouldn't have worn any of the things they made. A plus person wants to wear the same things the tiny people wear--only in our sizes. I don't want to wear a tent or a huge pointy collar. A nice two piece suit would have been nice-- one that hit at the hip line and not to the knees. But they would have had to make collars, button holes and darts. Easier to just swag the woman in sheets of fabric.
I thought Kayne was so genuine, thoughtful and funny. "She had rhinestones on her shoes, so I knew we'd get along." That just cracked me up. And his thoughts about being plus size were honest and from experience. And then there were shots of him saying "please" and "thank you" at the fabric store. Charming. I like him. I did not like what he made. Oh well. I think the time constraints are just too demanding. Even the very most talented designer and sewer can't really come up with master piece in just one day.
Always love your nutshells!
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