...that I'm not really expecting answers too but would love them.
1) Why is it that the drivers who have neglected to clean the snow and ice off the roof of their vehicles can be found driving in front of me? Is it to provide me with the thrill of dodging the ginormous pieces flying off? Is it the excitement of potentially having my windshield smashed?
2) Why do men feel compelled to fart no matter whose presence they are in, especially when I am there in a professional capacity and I do not need to “share” the experience?
3) Why does my Doodle-Diva-Bug kitty feel compelled circle my head and step on individual hairs on my head at the butt-crack of dawn?
4) Why does same size underwear fit one day and not the next?
5) Is there a real and viable reason for a 37 year old to still be getting pimples?
6) Why can’t the Maine meteorologists ever get the storm predictions right?
7) Why do I always feel sleepy at some point between 3pm and 6pm but can’t sleep through the damn night or wake up AFTER my alarm clock goes off?
8) Why do I think of the most fabulous creative ideas or excellent solutions when I am in the shower, dripping wet obviously, where I don’t have the tools available to write them down?
9) Is there a reason why I go to bed freezing my ass off at night and wake up roasting my ass off in the morning?
10) Why do I have this adorable and extremely painful crack in my nostril that is the size and depth of the Grand Canyon and refuses to heal no matter what lotion, gel, balm, or medicated crap I slather on it?
“Is it any wonder I’ve got too much time on my hands and it’s ticking away with my sanity? It’s hard to believe such a calamity.”
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