Have Surface, Must Cover

Oh, and don't forget to vacuum the dog!

If I sound slightly incoherent it's because I'm a bit visually overstimulated after spending 7 days in a house where every flat surface is covered. Not with doilies, placemats, decorative items, or functional things, but with paper. Empty and full envelopes, bills, letters, clippings, receipts, lists, contact numbers, blank paper, pads of paper, newspaper, fliers, grocery sale papers, coupons, books, pamphlets, instruction manuals, scraps with numbers on them or random words or names, photos of family and friends and pets, printed email or other internet detris, vet and doctor paperwork, tickets, business cards, stubs from various and numerous I don't know what, maps, labels, boxes, stamps, junk mail, real mail, "this is not a bill", insurance, bank statements, bank stuff, package remains, price tags, folders, calendars from many years, magazines, catalogues, and much much more. Not only have the flat surfaces been taken over, but also the walls and lamps. Anything a pin or a clip can be attached to has paper hanging from it and on it.

And I'm afraid this "must cover every surface" (MCES) gene has been passed from Gpa to Mom to me. Now, Mom and I try very hard to fight this gene, but the clutter builds up on surfaces despite ourselves. We both periodically go thru the piles and make sure the piles, if they must exist, have categories so things can be found when needed. Mom creates scrapbooks of the things she saves paper-wise or kick-ass collages. I use the scrapbook idea as well. That way you don't have to save the entire catalogue or magazine or newspaper. I also try to put my monthly bills in a handy dandy file coz the strand in the "MCES" gene that encourages the piling up of bills is VERY strong! I've even bought a shredder to take care of things like pre-approvals, credit card checks, or anything else that has my name on it.

Past visits to Gpa I've tried to clear up the paper or create or organize some sort of contact list or medication list. Before this visit, Mom showed me a picture of Gpa. In this picture (which was taken when I was a kid) Gpa is sitting in his favorite chair surrounded by piles of stuff and Mom says it's proof that he was like this in the past and he's not going to change any time soon.

So this visit I have accepted the lack of surfaces. I just worry because he doesn't really have an "organized" clutter system and he's having trouble remembering where he's put things.

And today I watched Gpa brush his dogs, then vacuum the brush, then vacuum the dogs, then wash rinse repeat 3 times, and finally he gave up and used a lint roller on them.

I wonder if a lint roller would work on my cats?

Just Call Me Tractor Girl

Well, this vacation has been jam-packed with busyness and "first" things.

I've been cooking up a storm, trimming hedges, making yarn dolls, washing dishes, letting the dogs in and out, making sure Gpa's oxygen thingamabob is still working coz he can't hear if it isn't, and doing laundry.

Today a first. Gpa's grass was getting very out of control and tall. I asked him if he has a push power mower and he said he hasn't started it in 10 years. Yeah, not going to start by any means. So he told me that he would do it and that he didn't want me to "work too hard". I told him (coz it's been three days he's not been feeling well enough to get out of his PJs) that I mow my own yard and that I wanted to mow (yes, I actually said I wanted to mow, let lightening strike me now). He and I got changed into scungy clothes and he taught me how to use the riding mower. That's what I said, the riding mower. Now, I don't drive a stick coz I have a hard time paying attention to several things at once and doing two-handed actions simultaneously. So I'm watching Gpa do this, press this, move this, reverse this, forward this, blade this, etc. He gets off and I get on. Well, I jerked that mower around HARD, but I managed to mow the front yard and even circle around the Pampas grass. He did the more difficult manuevers (sp) around the corners and all the reversing. Then he did the side hill and I did all the rest. Gpa has a very very big yard in the back, an acre plus or minus a bit coz of the trees in the back. Anyway, by the time I was on my 3rd time around the back, I finally got the hang of reverse/neutral/forward and was doing really well, not professional, but pretty compentently mowing around all the obstacles in the back - I had to watch for stumps, rocks, thick branches, holes, ditches, and various other things - but I DID IT. An accomplishment. I know it sounds minor, but it was a major accomplishment to me.

Then I had to hurry inside and get the bread dough on the porch coz it had tripled in rising and needed to be punched down as I'm making Spaghetti Bread to go with Chili tonight. Gotta go stir the chili.

Getting On With My Senior Citizen Self

I'm at my Gpa's right now and I have already had a nap a day, gone to bed early every night, listened to the TV at an infinitely loud volume, and eaten at a pizza buffet restaurant.

As a "young'un", I've trimmed some major weedage bushy thing (made a huge pile of shrubbery trash), driven myself to a close-by used bookstore, grocery shopped for meals, and K-Martted.

I did three loads of laundry today and almost flooded the basement. Gpa has the washer hooked up to a hose which feeds into a big sink which in turn drains into a sump-pump. I washed a load, never even seeing this set-up. I got the second load going, first in the dryer. Went upstairs to fart around, came back downstairs just in time to prevent flooding the basement because the jerry-rigged "filter" on the end of the hose had shot off with the force of the water and plugged up the sink so the water from the washer was just about to overflow the sink when I panicked (major basement floodage flashbacks from my basement/washer incident) and lifted the lid of the washing machine and the water stopped. I went upstairs to get Gpa and he was the one who found the "filter" in the drain and then the sink emptied rapidly into the sump-pump. Thank Goodness! So while I was down there having some OCD issues, I fixed the "filter" up with a big-ass twist tie and hooked it to the contraption holding the hose in place. No way the force of the water will shoot it off again. What is the "filter" you ask? Some sort of metallic mesh tube which apparently is supposed to catch the solid fuzzy crud that comes out with the water.

I have made Gpa two meals so far... tortellinis in Robusto Roasted Garlic Sauce and fake meat (Garden Crumbles by Morningstar/side I can never remember which it is) with garlic bread and tonight meatloaf with mashed potatos and roasted green beans. This is the first time I've ever made meatloaf and it came out awesome. It cooked all the way through and tasted just like my mom makes. She gave me the recipe before I came coz she said Gpa would like some. I also made the mashed potatos homemade. Boiled up some little red potatos and mashed away with butter and milk. They rocked. Gpa was very impressed with both the meatloaf and potatos. Unfortunately the green bean adventure was a total human loss. I roasted green beans fresh from the garden last year and they were terrific. Apparently, grocery store green beans are not the same and they came out awful. At least the dogs like them. I'm pretty sure the oil on the beans is going to give them the shits. Oh well, they're Gpa's dogs. He'll do whatever he wants.

I got him a rice cooker today at K-Mart coz he gets so tired standing in the kitchen waiting for the dogs' rice to cook in an majorly inappropriate double boiler pan set he has (inappropriate coz he's used it in the past to melt paraffin and wax - eeee!!!) We tried it out today. I'm glad he didn't see the first batch cook, had me a bit worried. I'll experiment more tomorrow. It might need more water. It has this warming thing it does after it cooks all the water away and the rice got brown today. If he forgets, it may burn, so I have to fiddle with it. But he liked how the rice came out for the doggies. That's a plus.

Well, I have to go and put in my newly purchased ear plugs so I can sit in the living room and not go prematurely deaf with Gpa while he watches TV and I read. These past two nights my ears have been ringing when I go to bed.

The Biggest Four Leaf Clover EVER

Last evening, on my way back from the corner market, I passed one of my neighbor's lawns where the clover is running riot. Big clover and practically the entire front yard. The town last year dug up their front yard to fix some sewer pipes and seeded their big mess, but instead of grass, it appears they seeded clover. Anyhoo. I have a bit of OCD when it comes to clovers, ever since I was a wee kiddo. Clover will stop me dead in my tracks and I just HAVE to look for four leaf clovers. I tend to find them which only reinforces the OCDness of looking. So last night, after purchasing my dinner, I stopped and promised myself a "brief" look-see. And what to my wondering eyes did appear!!??

The biggest god-damned four leaf clover I have ever found. Pictures below. It is being pressed between pages as you read this. I plan to laminate the granddaddy of all 4 leafers and carry it in my purse. Wouldn't you?

Here it is in major close-up so's you all can see that I did not jerry-rig it together. My childhood friends were known to do that and try to pass them off as real. I could always tell...

The Stones From Mother's Day

This one isn't actually from Mother's Day. This is my "themed" one from my second day of Stepping Stone Class. I think it has a beachy keen feel to it.

On Mother's Day I went all ballistic with the colors - Mom said it looks like a Jimmified sundae! The color bits are plastic thingies I found in the fish tank aisle a LOOOOONG time ago. And bought and squirreled away coz I'm a rainbow impulse shopper and packrat.

On this one I experiemented with glitter. When the sun hits this one just right --- ooo eee can it blind you!

Hopefully Mom (Wednesday's Child) will post hers soon. Hers are creative and interesting.

It's Official, I'm a Geek and Totally Non-PC

The geekishness because this weekend I pre-ordered the new Flash Gordon/Savior of the Universe DVD at my local Borders.

The totally non-PCness is that I used the word "gay" in conversation while ordering said DVD to describe Timothy Dalton in his little green Robin Hood-like costume and as I was speaking with a possibly alternative life-style clerk, I quickly followed said non-PC comment with "gaily frolicking through the Trees", so's to not give him the wrong idea that I'm an inappropriate shoe-leather eating social hermit that should only be allowed out with trained staff.

Well, I'm All Packed But I'm Not Leaving Yet

I believe in being super-prepared beforehand. That way, I can just “go” as I’ve already planned, checklisted, mailed, packed, repacked, and gathered everything. No worries. Yeah right.

I only have the mowing, vacuuming, clipping three sets of claws, and typing up my caseload brief left to do, well despite the day to day stuff.

I mailed all the stuff I don’t want to carry on the plane to my grandfather last week. I have to call tonight to make sure the box got there. If not, I’m shit out of luck with toiletries and stuff to make. I plan on creating collages again and I offered to make yarn dolls as wedding favors. In the evenings, I plan to be busily winding yarn to make grooms (apple red) and brides (white) for the children invited to the wedding.

I’m taking along an Andy Rooney omnibus (3 books in one) as reading material to tide me over until I get to a used book store. I thought the brief articles would be good for the Short-Attention-Span-Theater that tends to happen to me in airports and on planes and the first day I am at Gpa’s. Oh, can’t forget the word searches and crossword puzzles.

My plane will be leaving at the buttcrack of dawn. My poor beleaguered father has to also be up at that time to drive me to the airport. But on the plus side, when I arrive at my destination it will be lunch time and Grampa wants to take me to CiCi’s – the all you can eat pizza, salad, and dessert place. I am SOOO looking forward to that! Not sure how I am going to handle breakfast that morning…

While on vaca, I plan on doing a lot of sleeping, napping, reading, going to used book stores, clipping hedges, dodging mini-dogs, shopping for groceries, cooking stuff for Gpa, and did I mention napping already? I did? Well, when you go visit a senior citizen, you do what they do. Napping is priority number one!

I’m trying out a Crazy Aunt Purl cat suggestion. She uses Feliway Comfort Zone for her kitties to reduce stress and beating the crap out of each other. I bought one of the plug-in devices this weekend. It may be too soon to say, but I think, and this is just my biased opinion, it’s helping with the aimless zooming around the house at dangerous speeds (Moomin), plucking between-toes-fur and whining for meals (Doodle), skittishness related to anything out of the ordinary (Hobbes), and everyone is finishing their meals at the same time. It seems to have reduced a bit, a bit mind you, of Moomin’s chomping and the majorly aggrieved reactions from the other cats (hissing, spitting, growling, and whacking him on the head). I didn’t hear any major cat fights this weekend and Doodle actually played chase with Moomin on Sunday. We’ll see if there are any more changes.

Got to get back to my regularly scheduled stuff…

The Law Offices of Moomin, Doodle, and Hobbes

The verdict is in… we’re the “Purrfect” Attorneys at Law

“We specialize in all things feline.”

Boundary Disputes – Is your nap place being taken over by your human or are you being rousted out of your sunny spot by a cat companion?
Rights of Way – Are you continually getting stepped on? Accused of purposefully being in the way or of deliberately tripping your owner?
Partnership Disputes – Are you not getting along with the family dog?
Criminal Defense –Do you have a catnip addition?
Discrimination - Are you declawed and need your disability taken seriously?

Moomin in the fresh-just-out-of-the-dryer laundry, ooh so warm!

Hobbes using legal drugs.

Doodle insisting I drop the remote and pet her.

Saturday with TJ

My friend J2 and I managed to spend Saturday together as her husband's plans with her fell thru and he "gave her permission" to spend the morning and early afternoon with me, a friend in need of friendship. We went to a craft store and the Christmas Tree Shoppe in the morning and then had a picnic lunch on the Eastern Promenade (near the Waste Treatment plant, so we got eddicated by signs while walking to where the water was). Here is a brief pictoral of our Day of Fun!

I brought my kaliedescope (sp?) along and took this really good one of TJ's face multiplied many times. I can't wait to email this to J2. Wonder what it would look like all blown up and poster sized?

TJ wanted to look thru the 'scope so I had to make sure he didn't smudge the marble or the viewer as I wanted to take more pictures with it. I had a hard time getting it back. Then we ate our picnic lunch. Those chips in the background, mighty tasty!

The Narrow Gauge train went by, blowing it's horn and going really slow. There was an "outdoorsy" car full of waving people but I didn't take their picture. TJ kept telling us, "no train" coz he didn't want to go for a ride. We told him we were going to fly a kite instead.

Here's a blurry picture of the kite. I'm flying it so that J2 could look after TJ while he ran around chucking rocks in the water and trying to hold the kite with assistance.

And now we are on our way back to the car to go get an ice-cream! Yeah!

Have I Got A Meme For You!

Again, what does this word mean?

Anyhoo, its title is “What’s One of the ---- Things You’ve Ever Done?” Fill in the blank with the numbered words below to answer the questions.

Have fun reading it, it’s a long one, so consider it as weekend reading.

1) Most grown-up? Becoming a home owner.

2) Least responsible? Shopping like there was no tomorrow in my 20’s. I thought nothing of shopping Friday night for that weekend’s outfits. I would never do that now, but it was fun to live high when I could.

3) Expensive? Buying the house, next is buying a car, next would be the recent replacement of all windows in the house.

4) Cheapest? Book signed by Isaac Asimov bought at a used book sale for 50 cents. Not to mention all the appliances and hardware my parents give me secondhand when my dad wants a newer version of whatever it is.

5) Most altruistic? One day, the parent (of the child with Autism I worked with) was driving us (child, child’s younger brother, me and her) to the school. We got to an intersection and the parent was waiting for a space in the traffic when all of a sudden we were rear-ended very hard. She’d had her head cranked around to watch the traffic and hit her temple on the side of the doorframe, I had just turned around from answering a question the sibling asked, and both boys were safely in their car seats. The mother turned to me, in lots of pain from her head which was raising an extremely large egg, crying and asking how the children were. I told her they were fine. Another driver called 9-1-1 and an ambulance came pretty quickly. They assessed all of us and decided the mother needed to be transported to the hospital so her head could be checked out. The mother had called the father but was unable to talk to him. She gave me the phone and I had to try to explain what happened to a very excitable NewYorker. He asked if the van was drivable and would I meet him at the hospital. I said okay. The ambulance drives off with the mother. The child with Autism appeared to be oblivious of all the drama, but the sibling was very aware that his mother was being hauled away and he started to tear up. I looked at him and told him that his mother was going to be okay, we were going to follow his mommy to the hospital and I, “Super Sam” would drive the van. The trust in those eyes gave me the strength to turn around and put aside my doubts about driving the van. I’d never driven one, especially a damaged one with the gearshift as part of the steering column and two kiddos in the back seat that were suddenly all my responsibility. I managed to get the van going and drove cautiously to the hospital, remembering to keep my voice light and unconcerned to keep the sibling calm. I get us to the hospital, two kids in tow, one lunch bag, and my workbag. I asked the staff to find us a waiting room with one door (so I could keep the child with Autism in a safe place) and to scrounge us up some toys and books. I kept reinforcing the autistic child with bacon, reassuring his sibling, and waiting for either the father to show up or news on the mother. Both arrived at the same time. I had to drive the van back to the home, while the father took the family once the mother was released. After getting to their house, I asked to be excused for a while and went off to hyperventilate in my car for some post traumatic release.

6) Meanest? When my brother was a baby and put in a “Johnny Jump Up” thing that hung in the doorway, I would check to make sure there were no parents around and then hang onto the bottom of it. Once he was sufficiently low enough, I would then let him go like a catapult and watch him bounce around hitting the doorframe. I also made him eat catfood, withheld my company from him when he really wanted to play with me, and got him in trouble every chance I could which mostly ended up backfiring on me.

7) Funniest? In high school, late afternoon, I was in that state you get into when you’re fatigued and anything strikes you as funny. Well, this other student, who was not greatly liked by anyone because of his major superiority complex, was walking to his desk. I was already seated so I had the perfect front row seat. He tripped over the strap of his bag and the expression on his face as he went down was priceless and exactly what was need to drive me over the slap-happy edge. Imagine a tan Kermit with even buggier eyes wearing the expression, “no, no, this can’t be happening to me, I’m too superior for this faux pas, no, I can’t believe I tripped over my own bag, I’m going down!” I lost it, completely lost it. Every time I thought I was done laughing, his expression would flash through my head and off I went again. Good thing the teacher was tolerant and it was the last class of the day so everyone was a bit loopy, I laughed for an hour straight. Best damn exercise I’ve ever had and the most fun!

8) Saddest? Losing loved ones; family, friends, and pets. I can’t tell these stories, too sad.

9) Craziest? One night some sorority sisters and I decided to wade/swim to the middle of the river in the middle of town and spray paint “The Rock” with our Greek letters. We went to go see our handiwork the next day and it was gone. We found out another group had the same crazy idea and spray painted about an hour after we left. Bummer!

10) Most fun? Our bus rides to school while we lived in Germany were just shy of an hour long. Most times we just talked with friends or listened to our Walkmans (they had just come out!). But other times we tried to come up with stuff to amuse ourselves for the boring ride. One of the things I contributed was “Squish”. There were five seats in the very back of the bus. Typically the Seniors had control over this area, age descending as you went towards the front of the bus. The roads in Germany are very curvy and I thought it would be fun to see how many people we could jam into the back seat. So every time we went around a curve, we would lean and pile to that side (the squish part of “Squish”) and a person would jump in. Next curve same thing. Our highest score was 10 people. The side effect of squishing was squeezing you so hard you just started laughing.

11) Most illegal? Trespassing in a cemetery after dark while in college or the speeding ticket or the time I got pulled over by a cop on a bike because he saw that my inspection sticker was expired (by 8 months!) when he rode by me during a red light. He made me pull over after it turned green. How mortifying – bright red sports car pulled over to the side of the road by a cop on a bike writing a ticket.

12) Most dangerous? Spontaneously (but having thought things over for several weeks prior) breaking up with my college boyfriend at a friend’s wedding while he was drunk and belligerent because if I didn’t do it then, I would still be with him and miserable. And instead of staying in the hotel room he reserved for us, I opted to be driven back to college by 4 drunken frat brothers (of my boyfriend). I chose to take the chance of being in a major car accident rather than stay in a hotel room and get the shit beat out of me. I filled them up with fries, hamburgers, and lots of coffee and I made it home safe and sound. SomeOne was looking out for me.

13) Most creative? When I was a pre-school teacher, that’s when I was at my most creative. I was constantly making things, coming up with curricula, projects, and ways to teach concepts without the kids knowing they were learning. The kids really enjoyed my class and the best part was the younger kids would tell me they couldn’t wait to be in my class next.

14) Most lemming-like? The She-Mullet.

15) Bravest? Going to the dentist for both my fillings.

16) Most cowardly? Avoiding the dentist for 13 years. But you know when you have a phobia, you can rationalize anything into a reason not to go.

17) Smartest? Graduating from college with cum laude honors.

18) Stupidest? Drinking extreme amounts of alcohol during my college years and 20’s.

19) Scariest? Visiting the “Cult House” late one night in the middle of a field during my college days. With no flashlight and one book of matches, us girls (part of the women’s soccer team) stayed upstairs while the manly men (mostly wrestlers and football players) went into the basement which had a dirt floor. Lighting matches one by one, they found freshly turned dirt in an area that would roughly cover the size of a person. I’m not sure what exactly the manly men were doing down there or what they saw, but something happened or someone saw something and one of the manly men screamed, literally a high-pitched panicked scream like in the movies. When they came boiling up the stairwell, we ALL took off like bats out of hell. While running like maniacs for the cars, I (with multiple stress fractures in my legs) and the other injured person (his shoulder), a big football guy named Joe, were in the rear. Everyone else was out of sight. I jogged along trying to keep Joe in my sights. I looked down to check the next-to-invisible footing coz the ground cover was very grippy around the ankles and I was having trouble keeping my balance. I looked up and Joe was gone. As he wasn’t going that fast, I knew he should have still been in front of me. So, I kept sort of running and calling his name like a typical white chick in a horror flick, not paying any attention whatsoever to the ground. Next thing I knew, I’m treading thin air and I fell into this massive hole (!) landing on my hands and knees. When I looked up, I found myself bug-eyeing a huge pipe opening. A pipe opening big enough to have some THING come out of it and drag me into it. I climbed up the sides of that hole as fast as I could with compromised legs. Back up on the field, I started yelling, as quietly as I could because the neighboring farmer was rumored to not be opposed to using his shotgun to take care of trespassers, for Joe and I heard, very very faintly, “I’m down here”. I yelled back “where?” and heard, again barely audible, “Help, I can’t get out of here”. So I started running in circles trying to find out where his voice was and next thing I knew, I fell into another hole, smaller this time and pipeless, but that didn’t mean something couldn’t come out of the ground and get me, easy pickin’s. Joe sounded closer when I got myself out of the second hole. I finally find him in the granddaddy of all holes. He looked very tiny at the bottom of it and he was a big guy, 200 lbs at the very least. Pure muscle but with his injured shoulder, he couldn’t pull himself up for the life of him. So there I am, 130 lbs at that far back in past, looking down at him and he was expecting me to pull him out of this big-ass hole. Well, somehow we managed to get him out of the hole, the logistics escape me but I know it took awhile. Once we were both back on our feet, we warily took off in the direction of the cars. Why didn’t anyone come back for us? Their response was that they were afraid “we’d been ‘taken’ and were giving us 5 more minutes before they drove off for help”. Apparently we made it in their stipulated time frame because they were still there when our sorry injured asses came dragging up to the cars.

20) Ugliest? Middle school: wearing thick-lensed glasses that covered a vast amount of territory which included the lower part of my forehead and to the middle of my cheeks, sporting a shadowy uni-brow, zits, and long straight hair perpetually drawn back from my face with two barrettes, one on each side.

21) Most glamorous? The early 90’s, big salon beautiful magazine ad nearly platinum blonde hair, curvaceous dresses, high heels, immaculate make-up, big earrings, and lots of perfume.

22) Hardest? Getting out of an abusive relationship.

23) Easiest? Telling people “no”.

24) Most painful? Looking someone in the eye and telling them I didn’t love them anymore and watching them cry in front of me.

25) Most embarrassing? Going out on a first date with a guy who made a great first impression. When I met him he was wearing nicely fitting jeans that were appropriately long in the leg, a wonderful creamy white turtleneck sweater that looked yummy on him, and he was a surgical tech. That’s what I was expecting when I met him for our first date, but his first impression when south and fast… instead of showing up as yummy guy, he showed up in too-short too-tight jeans, shirt unbuttoned so I can see his hair dickey, and aviator sunglasses from the 70’s. Now, my stomach started to hurt a bit at this point (my stomach has always been an early warning system for me regarding men), but I tried to put appearances aside and give him a chance like my friends and family are always telling me I need to do. He asked me to show him the neighboring town, I did so, and I had a relatively good time despite mentally harping on his outfit. We came back to my town and went out for lunch. I can’t remember what we talked about, but I know at some point I used the straw from my drink to illustrate a point I was making. A few drops of water, water mind you, flicked onto him. You would have thought I flicked vitreous acid on him thus scarring him for life or rendering him blind by his reaction. The people at the tables near us were treated to quite a show. He said in this very cold voice, “What did you just do to me?” I didn’t realize he wasn’t joking so I laughed and said I’d accidentally flicked water on him, no harm done, wasn’t meant on purpose. He asked again in an even louder icier tone of voice, “what did you just do to me?” I stopped laughing and repeated I just flicked water on him accidentally. He said “Don’t you ever, ever do that again.” and he stared at me while exaggeratedly wiping water off. It was only 3 drops at the MOST! I sat there, my stomach (which had been giving me small jabs all damn day) went into overdrive and painfully cramped up. The people around us were looking at him in an appalled way. I didn’t finish my food. He finished his in silence, drove me home, dropped me off, and never called again. Thank god!

26) Most shining-like-a-star moment? Teaching a young non-verbal child with Autism to sign for “help” and having him grasp that concept. Also, being informed by parents of my preschool kids that the kiddos were reading in Kindergarten thanks to the academic foundation I provided them. Whoo hoo!

Must Share!!!

I just got this via email from a co-worker and I spewed water from my nose and I must. share. the. joy.

Busy Bee Up My Butt Weekend

Friday was busy because I had to follow incorrect directions to a training in a town far far away. I found it thru sheer luck and stubbornness and my reward was a book sale on my lunch break. I found some real treasures and spent the rest of the training on a “book high”. My dinner plans cancelled on me so I spent Friday night reading.

Saturday was check deposit/go to Wal-Mart to look for travel samples/look-for-the-Ford-Escort-of-concrete/dig up the garden day.

I found the be-all end-all of Ford Escort concrete at Lowe’s for $1.68 for 10 pounds. Should be good for tonight’s last stepping stone class. My theme? Not quite sure. I’m bringing the glass scraps again as well as a box of mica and a box of orange-y shells from a past trip to Florida. So I will just “go with my gut” when I get to class.

At Wal-Mart, I found some tiny body washes and my new favorite lotion in the required travel size. Jergen’s Original Scent Lotion, cherry-almond, so nice and it seems to be doing a better job then St. Ives Collagen Elasticin.

The wood around one of my raised garden beds was rotting and becoming a warren of housing and tunnels for bugs who like to eat and live in unpressurized wood. I decided to replace the wood with paving bricks my parents snagged from their neighbor across the street who replaced her front walkway. They’re a nice rosy color and there are tons of them. I asked and was told I could take whatever I wanted. I made three car trips back and forth because you can only load so many bricks in a Coupe before it becomes rather dangerous and Low Riderish. Not to mention there was a bike race/run race to navigate every to and fro. The cops recognized me by the 2nd trip to. Reny was very helpful with plotting out the brick layout, knocking the bricks and my ass over and enthusiastically licking my face. I also helped my mom make an Obos. Maybe she’ll take a pic and post it.

Then I cleared up some yard debris and called it a day.

Sunday I took pictures and went to lunch with the folks. YUM!

Feed Me Seymour!

Watch out, these innocent looking ferns are actually alien babies in the process of hatching to take over the world and eat us all up, YUM!

They look like a cross between "Little Shop of Horrors" and "Alien". I'm keeping my eyes peeled (peeled, hee hee) for a suspicious drop in the neighborhood wildlife!

One Small Step Out of the Hermitage

or "I'm Not Your Steppin' Stone".

I went to a garden stepping stone class yesterday. One of my co-workers who I don't know very well surprised me one day about a month ago and asked if I would go with her to this 2-day class. I said yes because I'd remembered my New Year's thought on how I needed to do more things instead of staying home hermitting. She told me yesterday she wasn't raised around making crafty things and is "stepping out" of her comfort zone and she wanted to learn how to make stuff this year.

Both H and I registered and got our materials list way ahead of time, but did that mean we got our stuff in a timely manner? No. We went to Lowe's on Saturday and only found one item, the plant saucer for the mold.


Between the two of us we had the old beach towels, old spoon, bucket, measuring cup, hammer, and I had the glass. Someone was giving away stained glass scraps and I snapped them up with no idea what I was going to do with them. Now I know, yeee-hears later, I was going to do this stepping stone class. We still needed the concrete.


We waited until the afternoon of the day of the class to get the concrete and as Murphy's Law would have it, the place on the list didn't carry it anymore. So we ended up going to another town to get it. Talk about a non-lunch lunch break. Anyhoo. We managed to find it, buy it, and lug it to class at 6:00pm.


The class wasn't really taught like a class. The teacher was more like a resource and time-line (coz concrete has a finite time to work with it). We spent most of our time sorting glass scraps in a sort of OCD way (sorting can suck you in and mesmerize you to the point you forget that you are actually supposed to be thinking of a design with the colors you pick), breaking the glass into mosaic-y pieces with the hammer and towel, and then creating our designs. Once that was complete, the teacher taught us how to mix the concrete. Turns out H and I bought the "Cadillac" of concrete which dries in an hour. The cheap stuff takes all night. So we had a very short time to put our glass in the concrete, as evidenced by my more than a few sharp edges. The concrete is supposed to "suck" the glass down just a bit and seal the edges. Well, my concrete initially sucked down the glass pieces and devoured them. So the teacher and I spent some quality time (read: me trying very hard not to go all truck driver and have a filthy mouth) digging covered glass pieces out and then soaking up some of the extra liquid. I tried putting pieces back in but as my "planned" random design was all kablooey at this point and I didn' t have much time, my stone didn't meet my expectations of perfection.


Oh well. Next week we get to do a "theme"-based stone. Not sure yet what theme I will be doing. I have two ideas so far. A pawprint made out of blue glass blobs or a Marilyn Monroe one with her pictures stuck to the bottom of big clear glass blobs with a glass glue/sealant. I'm gonna keep thinking on this.