OMG in the Local GOODwill

Okay, those of you who know me know I am not a fan of technology. I own no gadgets, no cell phone, no flat screen TV, no smart phone, no iPod, no MP3 player, no video games, no TiVo, no DVR, no satellite, no Dish, no SmartMeter, no tablet, no other fancy schmancy techno shit. I do have a digital camera (very outdated at this point), an iMac, and a Honda with beeping key. That's the extent of it, just a toe in the 21st century and I'm fine with that.

But today in Goodwill was the first time EVER that I have truly felt the lack as I really Really REALLY wanted to use a camera phone!!

You go to Goodwill for the bargain hunting.

The man I observed in the book section today apparently didn't receive the correct memo, he got the good wood hunting one instead. Or he got the bargain hunting memo and chose to interpret it as Goodwill was the place to pick up women for a bargain.

I seriously have retina burn from what he was wearing! Not to mention I threw up in my mental mouth a little.

And this is why I SO needed a camera phone so I could have covertly taken a pic of him because there is no way in hell I am going to be able to accurately describe what I saw that is going to sear your retinas.

So you will just have to imagine a big athletic guy (think no fat, tall, muscles but not in a Hulk way nor was he lithe) in a baseball hat wearing a short sweatshirt that ended at the waist and then something I have never seen on a man in a public community locale although I have seen similar clothing (if we can even call it that) on runners/bikers/swimmers and mostly on women at locations where one is engaging in a sport that does not involve the potential to hump another person.

He had on black Spandex leggings but they were so tight and so thin (opaque) that it was literally like he had on a coat of shiny black enamel paint from his waist (high) to his socks.

And ladies, what to men have that we don't have? Which becomes so VERY obvious when one wears a layer of shiny black enamel paint from the waist down?

Packaging.

And all I can say is...

• - he wasn't keeping anything back
• - his "soul" (if you will) was laid bare
• - the detailing was all there for the world to see
• - what you saw is what you'd get
• - Mr. DeMille, he's ready for his close-up
• - Lucy, he's home
• - rock climbers could have rested on it
• - he brings Donkey Kong to real life
• - villagers, lock up your women-folk and cattle
• - he'll be blinding someone with "science"
• - he's going to have some serious issues with his sperm count
• - and finally, the early '90s called to say they want their Spandex back as Madonna doesn't shoot those questionable Justify My Love videos anymore.

Please don't get me wrong, I did NOT stare, nor did I do a double take. I saw him out of the corner of my eye, couldn't believe what I saw so I tossed my hair out of my eyes, naturally got a better although brief look, and when I looked away the image was burnt into my brain. I continued to look at the books while he postured around the book section - I think he was trying to make me look again - and took himself to the bathroom, came out, checked to see if I would look that time which I did not (I had my contacts in so good peripheral vision, not to mention he had my ICK radar pinging like mad), spent a brief time in the book section, and then I have no clue where he went after that.

Damn, this post would have been "made" with a shot of him. But I will direct you to the People of Wal-Mart website so you can experience vicarious retina burn...

Have Three Cats, Life is Triple Good.

Yesterday was Moomin's birthday, he's a black St. Paddy's Day cat. Double lucky with double paws on all four feet. He got lots of kisses and head rubs (his favorite) and Doodle even deigned to wash his face (his ultimate favorite).

We are all off to bed to sleep some more, this Spring Forward time change is seriously kicking all four of our asses. Hopefully this week will be better. I'd really like to be able to get out of bed on time.

Have Books, Life is Good

In an effort to make my blog a wee bit more cohesive and not scattered all over the place (tho that is still going to happen regardless of plans), I will post a pic of a book when I finish it with a commentary on it. Not a review because I am not gifted analytically, despised that part of my college English classes - compare/contrast/infer/analyze/pick the reading apart so that you will never ever want to read it again. So I will just "comment" on what I read.

I just finished this book last night, part of my Barnes&Noble haul from last weekend.

I very much enjoy reading H.P. Lovecraft and the older publishings of other authors exploring the Cthulhu Mythos. There is just something about them, they are stories that have a wealth of detail, most of them contain journal writings from other characters (which I love), they dwell/take time on plot/characters/history/happenings. They are not fast gulp 'em-down reads which is one of my soap boxes: while there are authors today that clearly enjoy writing and spend time on their books/short stories, there are too many that don't seem to do so - it's like they slap-dashed something together, used big print to make the book fat, there are no details, it's hurried and fast and lacks depth, and it's like reading an outline (you know, those things we were taught in upper elem and middle school to use for your papers).

Now don't get me wrong, Ray Bradbury was an artist when it came to economy of words but his stories are in no way/shape/form of an outline and his word choices/how he put them together, well you can just tell he spent time putting the words in the absolute gem-perfect way to get what he was trying to convey across to the reader. When he describes a glass of milk, damnit I can see, smell, and taste it. Not many authors nowadays can do this.

So where am I going with this and what does it have to do with the book I'm supposed to be commenting on? Everything. While I enjoyed entering the world of Cthulhu again and glad I got the book to add to my collection, it was not up to the standards the older stories/authors have set. The book contains new (meaning current decade) short stories about Cthulhu and his host actually making it "thru" and what happens when they do.

Which I found interesting as most of what I've read is all about prevention, how to stop Cthulhu getting "thru".

Which is why I bought the book despite the rather large print for a paperback. Seeing the print told me I was not going to be treated to a wealth of details as of olden days, but I wanted to see where the stories would go. And it was interesting to see what a new crop of writers did with H.P. Lovecraft's mythic theme. They did catch my attention and I enjoyed reading them.

But while the stories themselves were not bad, they were missing something - the closest I can come is they were missing a "flavor" and a "flow" to a certain extent.

Regarding flavor: I always compare my love of reading with eating. To me, books have flavors and the best of them is like a full-on meal or appetizer or dessert that is so frickin' good you just can't stop eating it and savoring the tastes. (And books don't have calories.) The older books/stories have that "mind flavor" that gets the brain tastebuds going and you just want the story to never end because the writing "tastes" so good.

Regarding flow: when a book sucks you into the story so hard that you are "there"- you can feel/taste/hear/see the story, where it's at, what's going on, and the characters are people. It's no longer about words on a page, you have no awareness that you are reading a book, and you are "there", now that's flow. Nothing more crappy than reading, starting to get sucked in and all of a sudden you are shocked back out of the story because some author did something to make you aware you were reading - a typo, a poor choice of words, a character did something that didn't fit the flow, the dialogue was stilted, whatever.

Another thing, some of the stories had unanswered questions/loose ends or seemed "unfinished" at the end. I find it rather frustrating to not have a hint of the answers/directions of the loose ends if the author chooses not to "tie things up". I don't insist on having everything spelled or explained out, but I do like some idea of where things could possibly go instead of some ending that causes me to read the story again several times (which I actually don't mind as I am a re-reader) but makes me question my reading abilities because I still can't get any ideas on what is going on or going to happen.

Overall for me: it's a good "beach read" - enjoyable, caught my attention but not to the point where it would make me stay up all night reading it. And I like adding it to my collection.